I think we could all admit to making decisions based on fear and not what we actually wanted from time to time.
In fact, I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that for a lot of us, this occurs on a daily basis.
I know I’m completely guilty of making decisions based on the fear of what would happen if I chose to stand up for my real beliefs.
If I actually stepped outside of the Laura shaped box and did what I thought was right and not what I thought others wanted to see.
But when we make decisions based on fear and not our true desires, we will always end up unsatisfied.
There will always be a quiet nagging voice within us that knows we didn’t make the decision we wanted to. And even if we tell the world that we’re living freely, building our dream life, doing what we want to, we know deep down that we’re not.
And this leaves a really anxious feeling in the pit of your stomach.
I’m saying this as I’ve been running down one of these rabbit holes recently in my business. Chasing after a dream through the fear of not being able to make my real calling work so following what the pack’s doing.
I’ve spent countless hours and money doing something that my heart wasn’t truly in.
All because I was scared to do it my way.
I was telling all those around me that it was right for the business and what I wanted to be doing but I was starting to feel really uneasy about the whole damn thing and procrastination had taken the steering wheel big time.
So I’ve been taking time out to reassess my goals. I’ve stepped back to realign myself with why I started my business in the first place.
- To inspire women to live freely
- To help women work through their fears and become their own biggest supporters
- To help women take daily actions towards their ideal futures
And I looked at how my new business venture lined up with these.
So I then had to make a big decision.
Run with the idea anyway and not waste all the time, effort and money I’d put into it (the Fear route), or learn from my decision, work through where fear took the reigns and use this to help notice it quicker in the future (the Freedom route).
After a lot of thinking, I’ve decided to go back to the drawing board with my business idea and start again. But this time using what I’ve learnt to help highlight when a decision is not sitting right. To not allow me to go that far with it next time.
Because really, I knew it wasn’t right from the beginning. If you really tune in, you do know.
(I would say here not to confuse a fear decision with a big decision. A big decision which is right for you also brings up fear and procrastination, but deep down you know they are right. You know they are in alignment with your desires. When your decisions are based on fear alone, it will be a different voice.)
So if you feel like you’re making decisions based on fear, ask yourself these questions:
- What decisions have you made recently which have been based on fear?
- What fears were they based on? The fear of what others would think, the fear of failing if you made the decision you wanted to, the fear of doing it a different way to everybody else?
- What are your true desires in this area? What do you really want from this aspect of your life?
- And how does this decision help you reach these goals?
If the answer is it doesn’t, then it’s time to reassess.
- How can you tweak your decision today so it starts to direct you back towards your dream?
- How can you use what has happened to help you going forwards?
- What are the positives you can take away?
Because only when we know exactly what we want and start taking steps towards it, do we start to quieten the inner voice of doubt.
This is when we can confidently make the decisions we want to and not what our inner fear is telling us we should do.
So here’s to making the decisions that we want to make. Because this is what gives you the power to step up in your life and be who you want to be.